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Leonidas - A history lesson

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We talked to Olympiacos manager Leonidas, about his torrid past and uncertain future...

Leonidas was one of the PEN originals, being involved from the first season of our illustrious league. After a sabbatical, he returned to again join the league.

"We have had three interesting seasons. Two seasons we started on fire, only to fall away. This season has been by far our worst start ever but we will never let our heads drop."

Just yesterday Leonidas got the dreaded vote of confidence from the board...

"It's not something I've ever had to deal with. I'm very frustrated that my team have forgotten how to defend. Our last three results where 3-2, 3-2 and 4-3 defeats! I have full support from the board, and whilst that is reassuring I can't pretend that these results can go on! We are looking at boosting our defence and playing a more solid formation. It's a shame as we will probably lose our attacking flair"

We spoke to José Mourinho, a life long fan of Leonidas.

"For a long time Leonidas was the special one. He has great presence of mind. I'm sure he will turn it around."

Harry Redknapp said "I love dealing with Leonidas, he's always made sure there's a bonus in an envelope for me, know what I mean?!"

So where to now for our Spartan king?

"My boys have to get back the Spartan spirit. Give them nothing, but take everything. I want power and presence. I want to strike fear into our opponents. My boys will be training naked as of tomorrow. It's the Spartan way. "

What other things will he be doing to assure victories?

"Beards."

Go on...

"As of now I want my players to grow beards. They are not boys or women. They are men. They need to look and act like men. My best player, Giorgos (Samaras) has a fantastic beard. It's no coincidence. I've banned razors. And any players who won't grow them will be sold."

So, Leonidas is preparing his team to get ready for the next set of important fixtures...

"Gather round children. Eat hearty. For tonight we play in hell!"

Whilst I hope his methods work, I can't help feeling there's method in his madness..

"Madness?"

"THIS IS SPARTA!"

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