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Monday, 26 June 2017 11:31

The Grudge War

Written by Rambovanhardnut & Wheresmark
TheGrudgeWar TheGrudgeWar TheGrudgeWar

There has been no better a rivalry between Wheresmark and Rambovanhardnut recently. Both seemingly as equal on the pitch as they are off it. Always ready with a battle of words in party chats, other times settling it on the field. Regardless of the banter between them (the term banter is being used loosley here) the neutral are always in for a treat as the double-figure scorelines come in and the excuses come flying through like planes at Heathrow Airport. With Rambo's black book and Marks extensive facts, they seem to (think they) have every base covered in PEN and also, in the real world too.

I managed to catch up with both to see what they really thought of each other:


Q: Why the grudge?


A: Wheresmark Well, it could all start from the initial opening posts made by Rambo, there was an instant, 'Who the f**k is this arrogant prick' Then two days after his arrival on PEN there were his now infamous 'How to be good at PES tips videos': With tips like, ''Use 4 CB's'' Play PA2 and ping pong the ball about, the opposition can't get near'' And other pieces of horrific advice. Our personal grudge came because we get on well with each other, play each other a lot, and although loathe to admit it; are at a similar skill level' we're both fiercely competitive and hate losing to each other.


A: Rambo The grudge is hard to explain. I can't be sure but I think it started after I added his sister on facebook. I didn't want to add but when mark told me she had fake tits I couldn't resist it. It wasn't long after that she started putting love hearts on all my status updates, then all of a sudden this grudge appeared. Personally I think it's petty but what can I do?


Q; What is your opponent's worst PES trait(s)?


A: Wheresmark Rambo's will use any advantage he can to gain an advantage over his opponent, whether that's blimp cam, stupendously unrealistic tactics that break the game engine or just chatting so much s**t that he bores you into a coma thus giving him the win. He's really f**king sweaty, if he could score 6 R2 crosses against me with Sam Gallagher; he would. If he could Curl 6 r2 cut backs with Dudu; he would.


A: Rambo Mark only has one style.....what can he exploit in that game? If he feels you are weak down the wings, expect 18 crosses. if you play a highish line, expect constant through balls.


Q: What does your opponent do best on PEN?


A: Wheresmark To be fair to Rambo, he has some skills, he has good vision and can see a move opening up in front of him and passes the ball one touch really well. He's also fantastic at tactics, there are some better than him at tactics but I think Rambo is one of the best at adapting his tactics and learning from mistakes and changing things up.


A: Rambo he has a incredible talent for ripping people off. never have a seen a man with so many bum deals. the cataldi deal for a championship midfielder was one of my favourites. no shame.


Q: Is your grudge secretly a bromance in disguise


A: Wheresmark I think it probably is, he chat's a lot of s**t and is the most egotistical arrogant pookeynoodle here, but he's a funny guy who I really get on with and spend a lot of mic time with.


A: Rambo No


Q: Whats your worst moment vs your opponent?


A: Wheresmark Surprisingly it's not the 7-1 grudge match streamed match, that game was slow and sluggish and didn't hurt too much. But in PES 16, Rambo beat me 7-0 in a game that felt perfect, no lag, no delay - he was just better than me, to lose that much to him fairly was hard to take.


A: Rambo I played him recently and it was so bad i had to have a week off work.....i still have the recording, literally constant spamming of through balls.


Q: Whats your best moment vs your opponent?


A: Wheresmark Wow, there are so many.... Knocking him out of the PS4 Prem Cup, having beaten him in every competitive fixture ever (manual doesn't count) also the 10 win game streak i put on him in a row was pretty tasty, as was the 13-6 annihilation.


A: Rambo I think the 7-0 beating i put on him in the streamed game was possibly the best moment of my life.


Before the Grudge was declared they had recorded 62 results, with exactly 50% win ratio (31 wins each). The goal difference was weighted +3 in rambos favor, and he also held one more clean sheet. Despite what they both probably think, this all points to the fact that they are both equal over the course of time! So after all the waaaambulance moments, banter (again, the term is used very loosely) and mayhem where did this grudge war take mark and Rambo? Who cracked under the pressure? Well, of the 20 games played Wheresmark came home with 13 wins, rambo managing 7. After concede 129 goals between them both in 20 games, and only a single clean sheet, they certainally both went for it every match.

Wheresmark closed off by being very open; Rambo and myself will always have a grudge, we're that competitive and we both hate losing. When Rambo wins he shouts from the rooftops and you don't hear the end of it. When I win I become the biggest condescending tw*t about, giving him all the sympathy he needs. Unfortunately for Rambo, he knows that if we play the same tactics, I win due to my greater skill level. Great guy, great tactician, great friend, not as skilled.

Rambo finished off by saying I'm hoping we can move past this, but until I make sweet love to his sister I am not sure we can. I just need to unleash my fury within her and then I think I can forgive him for all he has put me through.

This grudge isn't going to disappear anytime soon, so we may as well enjoy ourselves whist it goes on. And on. And on.

Read 612 times Last modified on Thursday, 29 June 2017 15:17